just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
I want to be done crawling through windows but the sex is too good to stop...but I'm running out of excuses for where the bruises on my legs are coming from.
Hillary is trying to make pickle pops with vodka and sell them to kids at the ball park.
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
He's not actually Jewish. Turns out he just wears the yarmulke to cover his bald spot.
My brother didnt wanna sleep with her because she was my friend. Did I miss the memo where we're not supposed to be fucking each others friends? Oh well too late.
Just woke up and spent the first hour of consciousness throwing up with the Rocky theme song on repeat.
Did you ever think you lost your bong and then you find it in the weirdest place? I mean, who leaves their bong in the shower?
I really need to get a comfy set of masturbating shoes
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
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