and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
I just wiped my face with a slice of bread. Lowest point of the night.
he swears he got herpes from a bowl of soup
If i ever start ordering tequila again please tackle me to the ground and steal my wallet
I shouldn't be home alone with this much peanut butter and the dog. I feel like i'm being recorded to see when my desperation will peak.
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
THERE IS A WINE CUBE IN MY ASS THIS IS NOT GOING AS PLANNED
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
he had a beard, sexy nerd glasses and kept referring to his penis as 'this dick' its like jesus was saving my perfect match for my prime
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
Just because I know you’ll get a kick out of this, I sneezed earlier and cupcake frosting came out
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