would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
The tent neighbors already set us on fire w an errant roach. How do you think Bonnaroo's going?!
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
You know you're old when tea and a hot bath are more appealing than beer pong with lesbians.
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
The owner was showing me around and pointed at one of the bars and said "this is the one you're allowed to dance on. I could tell you wanted to ask." DREAM JOB.
That was the best shit ever it was like an exorcism for my colon
Fuck you bitch. You're married. You got a live-in dick at home for your needs. I still gotta surf this shitty town's bars for cock
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