This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
you called me at 4 in the morning and invited me over for pasta and a late night viewing of titanic.
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
Apparently duct taping your dick to your buttcheks before the first time she goes down on you isn't as funny as projected. She cried because she thought I was a girl the whole time.
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
God dammit everything I said last night about jungle juice being awesome just does not carry over into the next day
Randomize
