oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
A stranger just came up to me and asked why I hadn't texted him, and if he was just a one night stand. I live for these moments.
Everyone looked at me like I just fucked a gopher and was wearing it like a hat
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
i think i swapped my keys for drugs last night
BRING ME THE PLAN B. ILL GIVE YOU A FREE WATER BOTTLE AND A BUMPER STICKER AND SOME BACON BITS
Jenna, I'm going to use all my homosexual powers to steal him from you
Austin, I will climb on top of your shoulders and slowly suffocate you with my vagina
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
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