I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
My hand smells like rave and peanut butter.
Xanax and full house Tuesday is now Percocet Sunday
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
Just paid my weed guy with a check. I've got this whole adult thing down.
Dude come over...were drunk and I'm holding a T-shirt gun and discovered beer cans are the same size as rolled shirts.
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
We played wedding bingo. I made out with the maid of honor and fucked one of the bride’s sorority sisters. But I needed to get with the groom’s cousin, a mother-in-law to be, or the wedding planner to win and I came up short.
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
Randomize
