I came back to the apartment and he was waiting for me, covered in mustard.
needless to say I left
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
I don't know the quality of the hand jobs you've received in the past but it CLEARLY was not one from me
Dude, somewhere around here makes 4loko slushies. I just decided coming home isn't so bad.
I'm not gonna lie. having my legs shaved for me in the morning was a lovely surprise.
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
He only dropped the Russian accent after we started having sex.
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
I need to stop getting so excited when a guy unzips his pants and its bigger than my boyfriends. I look like a kid in a candy store.
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
I'm worried my dog collar isn't going to come in time. I might be trying on dog collars at PetSmart next week. That could get awkward.
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Randomize
