i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
Just did free shots of tequila at a walmart. Hello Mexico
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
You should have seen the pharmacists face when I paid for my inhaler refill and a box of condoms.
I damn near set my vagina on fire. WHILE The Flaming Lips played in the background. Intensely apropos.
I was afraid someone would drug test my pants so you set them on fire.
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
If only I could bank my drunk hookups for a sober IOU.
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
Haha i really think theres no better way to tell a paramedic sorry for breaking your nose than a beautiful and healthy edible arrangement...
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