I find it ironic that homeless people are so good in bed
My underwear smells like fireworks.
I was so high I couldn't tell if they were goosebumps or herpes.
my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
a girl walked up to me and asked if you were my brother. she shook her head and said 'im so sorry' when i said yes. what did you fucking do????????
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
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