Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
Scream out, "Tax-Free dick over here" in the bar. Ladies love tax free stuff
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
best line ever after sex today..."wow, that was a porn-star sized load"
He made fire alarm noises before throwing up all over the street.
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost.
He has an intense fear that my cat will attack his balls while we're fucking
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
I remember looking at his body and thinking wow you have a body sculpted by Jesus himself. Still not sure if I said that out loud or not
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
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