Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
that shit musta been laced I laughed for two hours and everyone looked like penguins
I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
Please tell me why 'cock-a-thon' was auto saved in my phone.
You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.
Her stepmother interrupted our sex to tell her it was midnight and she wanted to do a sympathy shot for her 50th.
Don't break up.
She gatecrashed the wedding and managed to get an invite to the open bar reception. Lucky bitch
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
I definitely fucked a Trump supporter last night but I wouldn't let him fully admit it because then I would've had to leave and his cock and abs were too perfect
Now I have to go back and sober fuck him. For science.
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
Randomize