is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
I hope my margaritas pass through security.
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
Im drinking ciroc out of an ice cream cone... my night is going fantastic
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
I slept through 4/20 and my roommates bought an entire ham that's just sitting in the fridge...
...Just this whole adulting thing gets in the way of mermaid drag shows at lesbian bars.
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
You know I've done a lot of messed up stuff. But I never thought I would have to put a bandaid on my dick. Yet here we are.
Man, I'm real high and googling what all my favorite figure skaters from childhood are doing now.
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
There's a guy in a plaid shirt running around asking everyone if they want to head butt him
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