Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
I'm bringing cupcakes to work today as an apology for my actions at the bar last night, my boss probably can't look at me the same ever again
There was no eligible dick at the ER. I'm pissed. Looks like "Searching for Strange at the Local Free Clinic" is a no go for the name of our first full length album. On the other hand, I got a dilaudid shot and I no longer feel like I have the worst bladder infection of my life.
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
Now that you have a boyfriend, can I have my vibrator back?
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
Bruh. You offered the cashier tater tots that you had stuffed in your pocket.
Yeah, and? She might've been hungry.
Randomize
