I just fell asleep with a sandwich in my mouth at Cosi..people definitely saw
the jolly green giant just puched the pope. halloween is the best.
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
he emptied an entire bag of goldfish onto the bed and rolled around yelling the theme to jaws trying to eat them
[insert really romantic bullshit about how much i love you and how beautiful you are so you will suck my dick tonight]
There are sesame seeds in my vagina. This cannot be explained with logic.
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
I'm not taking advice from anyone I've seen passed out naked at noon on the hood of a strangers car. Meaning you.
And then I fed you egg rolls in bed as you were screaming I'm moving out
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
I'm actually pinning crap for Friendsgiving like a boss right now. These bitches better show up.
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
Randomize
