I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
i feel as if its time to shave my pubes but i should wait until before the party. nobody likes a sloppy drunk girl with a stubble-crotch.
story of my life.
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
She's allergic to latex.
Lucky bastard.
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
Blew a line and having a jolly rancher... the day is looking up.
I'd say I'd distract him, but I lose my psychic powers when guys get girlfriends. And by psychic powers I mean taking off my top.
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
Have you seen our bachelor? He's MIA. Last seen being led to some hookers by Kanye look-a-like.
Just used the "Buddy" Poppy flower I got from a veteran to clean my one hitter. "I'm proud to be an American"
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
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