My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
I just saw a van full of amish parents and their kids. Those cheating mother fuckers!
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king
why is my forehead so bruised?
i found you outside knocking on the door with your head because you couldn't lift your arms.
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
I have hit nutritional rock bottom I am spreading peanut butter on to lays potato chips
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
I was carrying around a bottle of Jameson yelling rescue me
I know you're asleep, but I just had a motherfucking epiphany.
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
Can you please help mom and dad? Theyre trying to figure out Skype, and its like 2 cavemen finding fire.
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
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