just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
I want her autograph on my taint
There's gotta be a happy medium between the guys who only want to sleep with me and the ones that respect me too much to try to sleep with me.
Well, I'm getting my ex-boyfriend to get me a z pack to cure the chlamydia I got from my married fuck buddy so that I can fuck one of my students.
Bro what are you doing Thursday the day before I go to jail??
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
I was too drunk to remember throwing up so i probably didn't learn my lesson
Once again being low on toilet paper is forcing us into another round of our favorite game - toilet paper roulette - where there can only be 1 winner. Maybe.
I mean, you have to swipe right on someone you had sex with last week though, right?
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
I had to give myself a suppository. That was the LEAST fun I've had inserting things in my ass.
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
I'm gonna write a book entitled "when you give a cop a cookie..."
I don't even want to know.
Randomize
