That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
I just got off a plane from Mexico. At least 15 passengers dashed to the bathroom throughout the flight. Can you tell its spring break?
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
You crossed every boundary on the boundary spectrum last night. You're like the illegal immigrant of drunk actions. No more holiday drinking for you.
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
Some lady just walked up to me in the bar and proclaimed that I looked like a "shady motherfucker." Can't argue with that one.
I know. I'm a saint. Saint of sitting on faces.
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
Aww his grandma died? That's sad! No mourning sex!!! That doesn't lead to good things!
Its really hard to take a shit when the dog wont stop trying to crawl into your lap
I just folded my laundry and I washed 3 pairs of underwear and 6 jizz towels. Clearly I'm quarantining right.
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