It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
two words: eviction party
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
I just got my inseam measured in raffle tickets by a drag queen. Being fondled for charity is awesome.
Well, my nose won't stop bleeding from really bad cocaine and my purse is full of plastic gold coins. Also, someone saved in my phone as "tyrannosaurus sex" won't quit texting me. Savannah won. Let's put it that way.
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
Who cares if he’s younger, he’s hung like a moose. Your vagina will never forgive you if you pass on that dick
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
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