hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
I think the only thing that impresses me are nice penises...and Jesus. Jesus would impress me. Especially if he walked on water again.
I just saw a midget ride by on a scooter...wearing a bowtie and a helmet. My life is complete.
so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
i love waking up at 5am with an imprint of a toilet seat on my chest
Apparently unused tampons can also double as things to bite down on during public sex to prevent screaming...
She twisted her ankle and paid a homeless guy for a piggy back ride home from the bar.
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
They were swingers. Real swingers. Thought it was going to be awesome until some fat guy tried to put my dick in his mouth.
I COULD BREAK CONCRETE WITH MY FOOTBALL ERECTION.
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
He broke both of his legs jumping out of a window to escape a coyote.
Randomize
