Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
Nobody needs to come anywhere. Except on your face.
a queef is a wish your heart makes.
he was so excited that he found the elusive clitoris. i was like look christopher colombus, just because you found it doesnt mean you knew what to do with it
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
I don't want to talk about her cat for two hours only to dry hump till I'm blistered. Not worth it.
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
She kept telling the ambulance to sit down and then started crying when we told her it couldn't hear her
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
MAN I GOT NO SLEEP AND HAD A BREAKFAST OF SKITTLES AND ASPIRIN. I'M LIVING THE LIFE.
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
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