the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
Today's dinner table topic: the probablity of my dad turning gay if he ever left my mom.
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
Mango bong: no go. Guava bong: sweet flaming buddha it was delicious. I shall teach you the ways of tropical fruit trees.
While you were hooking up with her I pulled you off to make sure you knew what you were doing.
You said you were "testing the product for Chris."
I'm a bad man.
I'm going to avoid eye contact because my old high school English teacher is not who I feel like seeing after I just had a dick in my mouth
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
I kept screaming at his rabbit: "IT'S OKAY, YOU CAN HAVE SOME TRIX. FUCK THOSE SELFISH BITCHES."
Randomize
