Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
A white limo full of drunken 30 something business people pulls up next to me and asks if they can kidnap me until 1030. If I don't make it back tonight, call someone and tell them I died gloriously
You'll have to pretend I'm texting you with buddychecks.
Like the Jimeny Cricket of cockblocks.
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
Also, did you really start discussing the weather in the middle of telling you my sexual fantasy about you?
I walked into my house with my pants inside out, no shoes and a limp. My mom asked me if I had fun but I passed out before I could reply...
It turns out my English teacher used to pose for Playboy. She's an inspiration.
All I have in my new place is coke and a treadmill.. it's workout Wednesday
Bro you fell face first into the sand and then balled up into the fetal position and yelled help untill I picked you up, no more whiskey for you...
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
Those nachos came to me in a dream
Randomize
