Unless I'm getting a singing midget telegram, I'm not going to smile
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
If they ask for a stool sample we r no longer friends.
Somehow ended up at a stranger's bridal shower. Everyone else is already drunk.
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
Im eating a cannibus peanut butter and jelly sandwich, while snuggling a stuffed animal. Either this flu is really really harsh or I'm some kind of stoner toddler
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
The whole bar erupted and in happiness and confusion as I went on about pancakes.
I know they deliver ice cream, but do you think I can ask the delivery guy to watch the rest of the movie with me too?
Omg. I just remembered my underwear is in my wallet
I'm covered in jizz and the toll booth lady knew it
Randomize
