i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
Your friends ate a hole through an entire loaf of bread
I figured it out. hungover me hates drunk me, drunk me hates sober me, and sober me hates being sober. so yes, were blacking out tonight.
He said I came instead of I'm coming. I wonder if he noticed my state of confusion when I stopped blowing him.
Wasn't he an English major?
should we take a power nap before our cocaine gets here?
I woke up wearing a cow costume. I'm not even gonna try to recall what happened last night.
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
How am I?!! The turkey is dry as shit, I'm watching football in low def and there's no beer b/c everyone is in aa. Fuck giving thanks.
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
Your drunk naked friend is roaming the living room. Started roaming my room. Please come retrieve him
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old
Randomize
