ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
Just woke up on a couch in the FIJI house with 2 missed calls from someone I saved in my phone as "Some DU Kid Named TJ Maybe"
you make me proud to be your friend
I have a feeling that watching gay porn with you was the reason I was dancing in a hurricane of floating dicks in my dream last night.
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
This whole bra on the outside of my shirt thing is so convenient. It turns my shirt into a pocket to eat Fritos out of. Mmm boobies
I think it's safe to say I'm rolling my hypothetical balls off
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
I'm adopting to save the world from the moral outrage that would be my offspring
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
I've got to stop fucking tourists. If Chicagos piazza is anything like their dicks. I'm moving.
Life without a bra equals bliss.
I'm drunk. And I'm alone. Eating chicken fingers in my underwear. I'd say life is grand.
I'll be perfectly honest; there are times other guys have consented to have sex with me because of my punctuation.
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
Randomize
