just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
How do I ask where the Jello shot cups are at Walmart without sounding like white trash?
Plus idk what to say. Like hello dapper gentleman will you pursue me in a midnight hangout where I can be choked
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
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