honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
he was CRYING into my vagina
woke up to an overdrawn credit card. did you order the dawsons creek boxset last night?
i hope so.
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
Walking back from greek row alone at 3:30am in a child's kangaroo suit...not my proudest moment
you proceeded to scream out that it's your birthday to everyone who walked by before you collapsed in the middle of the street. happy 21st birthday to you.
New plan for Halloween: you dress as Waldo, I'll dress as Carmen San Diego. We can just hide in a closet drinking till someone finds us.
I can't find my underwear or one of my shoes but he baked me cookies for breakfast.
Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
I'm ordering dildos in a santa hat. You?
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
for future reference, singing eye of the tiger outside my door while i am having sex makes me incredibly uncomfortable
apparently not uncomfortable enough for you to stop
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