I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
I wish i could sleep and get drunk at the same time...those are my 2 biggest needs right now
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
It was the third Sunday in a row that I woke up in his bathtub. So no our sex life isn't that great anymore.
ummm i just drove by ur house and ur passed out on the porch. please call me when u get this
I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though.
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
Also adulthood=replacing meals with bourbon. And not getting your hair caught in a fan.
I look like a bag of dicks so if you could ugly yourself up that'd be great.
Dude too much vodka. I think I just puked up my heart
That's what you get for taking that guy home. The god of sluttiness is frowning upon you.
Final Summary: could he eat a lit sparkler? Probably. Could he do it while peeing off the roof? I'll tell you when you get to the ER.
I HAD SEX WITH COLBY AND HIS FIVE YEAR PLAN IS TO STEAL A REALLY EXPENSIVE PAINTING AND ASKED ME IF ID BE INTO HELPING HIM AND I WOKE UP IN HIS BED TO A WOMANS TUBE TOP NEXT TO ME
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