In the future we'll all be gay
i will soon be in a relationship on fb
you!?
me and your mom. i mean, lisa.
i've got to stop sleeping with short guys. they always turn into stage 5 clingers
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
What if we had a smart house and we could just say "baked" and it would rain donuts?
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
before we left she put a post-it on the floor next to the toilet saying she was a pretty pretty princess
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
Why are you there anyways?
Pickin up ball pit balls from craigslist
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
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