Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
Just did a kegstand with my dad. Happy fathers day.
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
Either I need to stop bringing you back to my apt or I need to stop buying ikea furniture
Covered in gravy. Never pour gravy while drinking.
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
Right, try not to commit a felony that costs more than 4 dollars cause that's all I have in my bail jar.
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
Do you recall asking me to zip line through your wedding dressed as a bleeding angel?
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