SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
Take one last look at my face, because I'm drinking it off tonight.
Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
I'm already at the bar. It's 2 PM. Help
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
She said I came to for a minute, shouted IHOP!! and then shook my head and said no before passing out again
Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you
Aren't you proud to know somebody who texts you "manifold facade" while dumping frozen colada mix into a blender of rum
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
I just slipped on ice and peed on my pea coat. There's a pun there but I'm too sad to make it
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
New rule: if someone asks if you would like to snort a xanax the answer is no.
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
Randomize
