Buying beer for freshmen. No matter what they ask for, I'm getting them Colt 45.
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
Yeah. I woke up in an awkward three way spoon with him and his sister. Tequila!
There's some random guy here dryhumping my kitchen door. If he is a friend of yours, please come and retrieve him.
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
Either it didn’t do much damage or I’ve lost all feeling in my asshole
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
If I hear that song one more time I will drive to hell and make John Lennon eat my ass.
Randomize
