Mom and Dad are dead. Trust fund
The ticket read "Found nude in a tree"
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
Do you relize what downtown will be like this week? Like open season. But instead of deer its hot baseball players from all over the country that we'll never have to see again. I swear the college world series is a gift from god.
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
This tiny cat is tiny breathing with her tiny lungs and im having a tiny freak out. Like those lungs have to be super tiny.
How can someone be so bad at fingering? It's such a simple concept
Yeah i was handcuffed to the bed all night but i actually slept like a baby
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
Would it be inappropriate to meet you at the airport after your family vacation so I can tell you all about the amazing sex I have been having?
Randomize
