i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
You tried to convince our cab driver that your $2 bill was worth $11.70
Why were you having sex on top of my left over pizza in the kitchen?
Sober Sundays just aren't working out anymore.
last karaoke night = doing dmx songs with a guy who threatened to stab me. so yeah I'm coming out.
I wish I could be at this cabin banging all these old dads
Some crack addled fool from the sketch ass motel behind the restaurant just gave me a flyer for an AA group when I was on my smoke break. I don't do mornings
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
I stopped his blowjob to raise 3 fingers & whistle the hunger games tune to the people walking past the window
The only person more miserably hungover from the party is the dog, and that's because he ate some balloons
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
Randomize