doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
Not gonna lie i was comfortable between the allsups air conditioners while you were talking to the cop.
You don't take my phone while I'm passed out, have a three hour conversation on it with Dealer Dave, set up a date with him and NOT TELL HIM THAT HE'S NOT TALKING TO ME.
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
We all make mistakes. Just lock them up deep down inside your mind so they can surface as weird sexual fantasies it takes your therapist years to decipher when your 40
Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack
This is why I love you...
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
If I was a guy I'd keep a condom in my pocket, in my wallet, in my backpack, in my car, in my shoe, behind my fucking ear
You tried paying your tab with the coaster
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
Randomize
