"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
there are definitely too many half naked pictures of me out there for me to ever be famous.
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
some girl at the bar told me my beard would tickle every inch of her body till she joy puked her face off.... that was so random and odd i just had to buy her a drink for having the guts to say it to me. WTF
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
I mean he gave me an 'I owe you an orgasm' fist bump
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
I've been sober for almost two weeks and it's been the worst two weeks ever. Even my mom told me I need to start drinking again.
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
Remember how I made that resolution to remain celibate for 6 months? Well, I just broke that
You literally made that 4 hours ago...
I love that they love me even though I might not exsist, its kinda like Im God.
Randomize
