i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
please tell me if i'm home and in my bed
negative
come find me please
I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
just won a stolen shopping cart in a dance off in a parking lot.
I just had the fat girl at the party come tell me I look sad and offer me a beer. I'm out.
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
Hungover like ... in bed with the Brita pitcher and a straw, only opening one eye at a time.
Judging by the fact that he asked me if i wanted to serenade him using cocaine and Taylor Swift I'd say I so have it in the bag.
No gifts needed, but if you have fireworks or weed that'd be good.
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
I'm convinced he's the patron saint of oral sex
The teenager outdrank all of us. All. Of. Us. I woke up and she was getting everyone water and fruit snacks. I give up.
It's been three years since Kelly shit in the to go box that we put in Sam's mailbox after we broke up. Considering Sam and I are friends again, should I finally tell him?
Randomize