spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
In case you were wondering, you weren't dreaming. I really did get stuck between my bed and the wall last night.
it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
He came up there while i was bartending, ate a salad, told me he wanted to divorce me, then tipped me 10 dollars....
Just asked the bartender if I could use the register to see my grades.
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
Yay! Also. When you're coming down eat waffles and touch yourself. You won't regret it.
Headphones came off my phone same time as The Weeknd sang "Who's gonna fuck you like me?"...Everyone at work heard it.
My professor just paused class to answer a phone call from her dog. Im taking shots before this class from now on.
I either have food poisoning or I'm pregnant. Either way, I NEED JESUS!
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