I'm a terrible person. There are two guys speaking sign language on the metro platform and at first I thought they were drunk and doing a silly dance.
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
You tried to initiate "Occupy McDonald's" when the cashier didn't give you enough ketchup.
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
You were stoned out of your mind. We were eating cold cuts and you wouldn't shut up about how it was the wettest meat you'd ever felt in your life.
You had your shirt off checking IDs at the door and you don't even work there
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
Some guy in the bathroom just took his shirt off and proceeded to tell me the story behind all of his stab wounds. That's what I get for making small talk
I just wanted to personally thank you for throwing clementine slivers at me across the room while we made out
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