Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
I'm single as of 11 minutes ago. I was the chick who drunkenly tried to climb into bed with you 2 weeks ago. Wanna make this happen?
my boss just accepted "because it's 4/20" as a legitimate reason to take Friday off
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
Just found out my rents have been paying my siblings to cockblock me for the past 5 years
Not as covert as you thought huh?
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
I'm not sure... How do you tell someone who was so smashed they couldn't remember shoving their dick into the fireplace that their mother actually witnessed the whole thing?
So how do I get back in good graces for trying to trade you for superbowl tickets?
he just fucked me for my cheese.
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
I'm basically the yoda of knowing when someone wants to sleep with you
Sorry I missed your call earlier. I was getting high with my high school band teacher.
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
Randomize
