CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
is the shake weight an appropriate valentine's day present?
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
i woke up with my wallet keys and phone missing and a treasure map to find them stapled to my shirt.
haha i know
6 beers and it feels like I've been drinking water... Daiquiri time
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
Next time, please cut me off before I'm at the point of pooping in the bathtub again
You can not love someone based on who they were when they were 9. Does he know how many dicks I've sucked since then?
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
Randomize
