if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
I would do laundry with you but I vaguely remember swallowing all my quarters last night as some kind of trick.
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
Oh trust me, i am. It's like magic, but instead of rabbits and doves its orgasms- He just keeps pulling them out of nowhere.
Even completely stoned shes amazing on the piano. There are like 7 people sitting on the ground listening to her like she's the messiah.
The look on the dr's face when she asked me the last time i had sex and i responded "like an hour and a half ago" ... priceless
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
I'm dressed as a caveman and drunk so that's not really an option
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
I'm home, and it turns out she didn't get it all. still picking Oreos out of my pubes.
my grocery cart consisted of hershey bars, sour patch kids, starbursts, mayo, 4 frozen pizzas, 4 lunchables, and chips. clearly, i can't do this on my own.
The people around me on the bus dont know im wearing glowsticks under my clothes. I feel like a super hero.
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