problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
got in a fight at the bar because some dude thought i was being sarcastic when i told him "sweet mustache". it really was a sweet mustache
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
i crunched every chip from the dorito bag and poured it in the vase. never again will i have to deal with cool ranch fingers.
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
Oh were you the stripper at that club last Sunday when i was trippin on acid wearing a giraffe outfit?
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
I don't care what the Chinese zodiac calendar says . . . 2015 is the year of the cock!
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
Fun fact: the guy I banged last night. His middle name on his birth certificate is "Windstorm."
Last night I was the DD and was trying to drop off some chick I didn't know at her place. The closest thing to an address I got was "where the goldfish go."
Randomize
