honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
so he came in my eye... should i throw out my contacts?
so I was thinking like, Rob Pattinson could make so much money whoring himself out dressed as Edward Cullen.
yeah, I mean if he's down to fuck a lot of fat chicks and stare at Tiger Beat posters of himself above the bed...
remember tomorrow: you burned the inside of your nose with incense. it hurt.
Dude you were so high some kid was kicking the wall and you were convinced it was your heartbeat
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
I'd apply for another job, but "staring out windows crying" is not a hot qualification right now.
im trying to look as sober as possible but i just poured orange juice and mayo into my milkshake.
You're 34. You can't make guys wait till the third date anymore. Step it up!
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
Please tell me you haven’t left campus yet!!!! I forgot my Hitachi and will not survive Thanksgiving without a steady supply of orgasms
Randomize