I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
Why the FUCK can i grow hair on my big toes but not on my chest?
I'm using process of elimination to determine which of our neighbors i fucked last night.
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
he couldnt get it up, so i stole his lighter. i needed to have some reason to say the night wasnt wasted
Under no circumstances is it ok to do naked cartwheels in front of anyone. i don't care how much ecstasy you took
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
Woke up shivering behind the titty bar, With the worst leg cramps. I'm like a poster boy for responsibility.
Dude, so the police showed up at my house with my wallet told me they found it in the church fountain then handed me a pamphlet on AA saying it was from the pastor. What happend?
Rather than admit to myself I've spent $756 at the bar this month, I'm just going to pretend I gave it to a homeless person...kind of makes me feel better.
He? As in you personified your dick?
It's a family event: you have to drink. No way around it. Its the law.
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
when some dude came up to you and said he didn't like your shirt you just looked at him and firmly asked if he really thought that you gave a fuck.
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
Randomize
