Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
I threw up into my coffee this morning.
I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
She legitimately thought I was hiding in the fridge, then she checked the second one to be sure
Wow i don't think I've had to send this many texts apologizing for my behavior since high school...
I'm not sure why, but my salad smells like a Big Mac. Or maybe that's just the smell of yesterday's, seeping through my skin.
So I paid Bumble $10 to see who liked my profile for a month. Cheap, easy dick. It's all about the economics, yo.
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
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