My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
No seriously, I have to sell the house because my wife found out I'm gay.
I just want to hang out with her.
You're a liar. Why do I have to give you reasons you can't have sex with my mom? I hate you.
Apparently I look legit enough, cause the 3 bums next to me just got kicked awake by cops, and I was allowed to stay sitting here. That's a plus, right?
He threw up over the balcony and blamed it on an invisible garden gnome.
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
Guy having heart attack in McDonalds. Classic.
A 12 year old Canadian kid said I was a pussy for only buying a 28-pack. I fit in better in this country.
She gave me a foot massage with her tongue. I think we're both scarred for life.
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
The ass gains better be worth it
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