i wish they had a 'baby daddy' section in halmark, like, "hey, i know you didn't want this child and you're doing a horrible job, but here's to making you cry on fathers day"
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
Nothing says "lifelong friendship" like FaceTiming in a sex shop.
I replaced his Viagra pills with sleeping pills.
My mom just told me my dad shaves his pubes while drunk and I don't know how to feel anymore.
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
Randomize