check it out our google latitudes are spooning
why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
i like that you affectionately refer to him as "creepy" ever time you talk about him
You were hopping up and down because you wanted only his strongest sperms to make it to the egg.
Darwin at his finest.
she said, "is it ok if I touch it?" that's when I knew I was in trouble... I knew she was a virgin but seriously..
He's trying to row the canoe up my front yard like he is Lewis and Clark.
I should show up to the gym drunk more often. I felt like i really motivated all the fat people.
You were high and telling me you felt like Pinocchio and that fire was bad for wood.
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
I'm laying in bed cuddling with my teddy bear and eating waffles. I need a fucking boyfriend
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
Randomize
